Saturday, August 22, 2009

Oil Companies Give BJ's to Americans

Was it as good for you as BJ's, 'murkn?

"As US taps supply, crude’s price rises" by Associated Press | August 20, 2009

NEW YORK - Oil prices spiked yesterday after the government reported a huge draw of crude oil from US stockpiles. The report was surprising because the demand for energy has been knocked down by the recession.....

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Translation; It is a RIGGED MARKET, folks.

You know the drill:

1. Pull up to pump

2. Get out of car

3. Drop pants

4. Insert gas pump into ass

5. Pump gas

"BJ’s profit drops, but beats forecasts" by Associated Press | August 20, 2009

PORTLAND, Ore. - BJ’s Wholesale Club says wet weather, food-price deflation, and weak consumer spending hurt its quarterly results, but the warehouse club chain beat analysts’ estimates and raised its full-year profit outlook.

The Natick, Mass., company earned $35.1 million for the quarter ended Aug. 1....

Shoppers have turned to warehouse clubs during the economic downturn. But the recession and lower gas prices continued to be a drag on the retailer. BJ’s said sales of discretionary items like electronics and jewelry suffered, while sales of cereal, meat, and household items remained strong....

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Oil companies shooting in yo' face after ****ing you in the pooper, 'murka?